What Inspires You — In Which the Fiber Arts Finally Get Their Due Attention
Last night I was speaking to my mother on the phone who is a very scattered and lovely woman who sometimes forgets that we have talked extensively about certain things and so, often asks me questions whereupon it is as if she is discovering who I am for the first time. Rather than finding this exasperating, I am appreciative (most of the time — ok, some of the time, and increasingly more so) at such fresh attention and her ability to completely see something in a new way. I know many artists would kill to suddenly see the world around them from an entirely new perspective and this is one of my mother’s gifts. Yesterday she asked me, just out of the blue (I think we may actually have been in the middle of talking about the weather — and when I say in the middle, I mean, I may have been mid-sentence, if not mid-paragraph), “What inspires you?”
I talked about reading and studying. I talked about alone time and the necessity of quiet thinking. I talked about writing and sharing my ideas with other people. The usual. Then I started talking about art and fiber and all the amazing things I have discovered about what people are doing through the blogs I read and the sites that I find myself linked to. I talked about how my knitting has evolved over the last year (It’s been a year now, by the way) and how it has come to incorporate so many things — some which I already knew like sewing and crochet, and some new things, including spinning and much more. I find myself more often drawn to needlework and weaving. Like Franklin, lace knitting has become a thing one does to relax (until you botch the pattern and have to rip out 3 rows about 7 different times before you finally get it right, but that is another rant). My mind is swimming constantly with what is out there and I find myself frustrated by my own limitations in knowledge — or maybe that frustration comes from a fear of experimentation. The usual difficulties with learning to create my own structure. I long to live outside the lines, but find that I am not always sure how to go about doing so. I get frustrated with a pattern and, rather than improvise, wait for someone to tell me what to do next. No wonder I feel so pulled in every which direction. My heart pulls one way and my mind marches toward another. These two have just got to learn to get along!
When I first started knitting, it was born out of a desire to do something more than what I could conceivably accomplish with my crochet hook. And also out of a need for some meditative task to help me combat increasingly regular bouts of anxiety. The ability to occupy my mind just enough and be creative and practical in one fell swoop was just the thing. I taught myself, then discovered the blogs and the knit-alongs and the euphoria of pouring over people’s stash aquisitions. As is my usual pattern, my thoughts on knitting have evolved considerably over the last year. The lustre of the commercial faded pretty quickly and in its place is a, not too surprisingly, desire to create something of my own. Unique pieces — one-of-a-kind. Over the past several months I have been amazed by the fiber artists who are doing amazing things (and some not so amazing things) in non-traditional mediums. Or maybe incredibly traditional mediums. It has been a very transformative process.
Lately my husband and I are giving some serious thought about how to combine our collective talents into something creative that will move us toward the goal of working for ourselves. We have some ideas, which we are developing and also which I am not quite ready to talk about here. I am still exploring my role in all of this and trying to come up with some more concrete goals for myself. Even as I write this, I am feeling aware of the abstract nature of my thoughts. But I keep coming back to this one thing — what inspires me. How lucky I am to have a mother who reminds me to ask myself such questions.
October 6th, 2005 at 8:50 am
What a great question. I think we all need to ask ourselves this because it’s a huge part of what makes up who we are. It seems like such an easy question, but it turns out to really make you do some soul searching.